"A Kiwi, a Swede, a German and a Canadian are all driving in a car... sounds like good joke material, eh?"

Well, long time, no write, eh? (Yes, I did just say 'eh').


I have finally found some time to write about mine and Sara's 2 week trip up the west coast of New Zealand. I will try to give you a day-by-day account of what happened, though I might fudge up a few details to condense this a bit.


On second thought, my trip recap is going to be written in parts, given how much I like to write about these things...




Alright, Day 1 (Tuesday April 10): Did I just get stood up?


Our bus was scheduled to depart at 7:45AM that morning. It is recommended to be there around 20 minutes before hand so the bus driver can load your bags and get everything sorted for take off. I got a cab and ended up getting to the station around 7:20AM, a little early, so I texted Sara to let her know I was there, and to text me when she got there. At 7:30AM, I was getting a little worried, but composed myself. At 7:35AM, I texted Sara again, a little more frantically, as I still hadn't heard back from her. At 7:42AM, I was calling her; most people's bags were already loaded on the bus and people were starting to board. She finally called me about a minute later to say she was on the bus and would be there in 5. Fortunately the bus was running a little late (which is the norm, we were soon to find out) and we both made it onto the bus in time. My heart rate came back down to a normal level, and I was able to be excited about our trip again- though I will admit to a great deal of curiosity about how it was going to go, especially considering the only thing we had really planned out was our bus ticket that morning- to Ohakune.


When we arrived in Ohakune, we made straight for the i-Site (which is this absolutely fantastic tourism franchise all across New Zealand, which will tell you all you need to know about attractions in the area, and help you book things etc.). The very helpful i-Site lady directed us to a canoe rental shop down the street (this town really only had one main street). It was there, with Yeti Tours (yeah, interesting name, I know), that we booked our 3 day canoe trip down the Wanganui River- for the following day. That afternoon consisted mostly of preparation for our trip, and buying food. We stayed at a little Hostel called the Alpine. We met a couple guys from England there who were planning on staying there for the next few months, for the up and coming ski and snow board season (see the mountain in the background?). Apparently this small town is crawling with people come winter, as the skiing tends to be really good at Mount Ruapehu. We had an early night, in preparation for our 9 o'clock pick up the next morning.


Day 2 (Wednesday April 11): Day 1 of the River Trip- Whakahoro to John Coull Hut


This day dawned bright but with some hovering clouds. We got up, got everything together and went and met our driver. Yeti tours gave us each 3 large blue barrels to put all of our gear into (so our stuff wouldn't get soaked in the canoe).

This is Sara, with all of our gear, waiting for our driver to come pick us up.

The drive took us just over an hour to get to Whakahoro. The scenery was absolutely beautiful on the way there, though the roads were extremely hilly and winding. After a while you stop appreciating the scenery and start longing for the moment when you can get out of the god-forsaken tanker type van you'd been rattling around in. Our driver, whose name has completely escaped me, gave us about a 2 minute run down about how to paddle a canoe down a river- a forward stroke, a backward stroke, and aim for the 'V' when you're going down rapids. Oh, and don't paddle over rocks, cuz then, if you're lucky, your boats gets stuck and you have to get out and push. And if you're unlucky? Your boat flips over and you get to play fetch with all of your gear. Right before he shoved us out on the river, he took this picture:

To be honest, I was really surprised with how little preparation they gave us, with regards to river paddling. We came upon some white water (aka rapids) that would have been pretty intimidating to beginner paddlers. Fortunately, I have some white water paddling experience, and was able to steer our canoe out of (mostly) harm's way.
That day of paddling was probably the most tiring. I think we paddled about 31km that day. Sara and I were also still very much getting to know each other still, so this trip was great for that. And Day 1 is always the hardest, because you're getting into the swing of things, learning how to push yourself and how far you actually can push yourself. The entire time was like we were paddling through a scene in Lord of the Rings- especially the Fellowship of the Ring, after the group leave's Galadriel, and before they get attacked by Orc near the end (Spoiler Alert!). Here are some pictures from our first day of paddling.

Our first break spot!

We had pretty good weather for the first half of the day (sunny with cloudy periods), but as Mother Nature would have it, the rain clouds rolled in, and it started to rain... and definitely more than a light sprinkle. The last 2 hours or so of our paddle that day were not particularly pleasant, and by the time we reached our camping spot for the night (John Coull Hut), we were both soaked.

This is the main building of the John Coull site.

All of the camping areas and huts are maintained by the Department of Conservation (DOC) and have site wardens. Ours on this night happened to be a family of three (father, mother and their daughter, who was about 9). We got changed into dry clothes (ah, Heaven!) and they had drying racks where we could hang our sopping wet clothes in front of the fireplace. Dinner was an interesting combination of carrots, dried sausage, and roasted mushrooms (we roasted the mushrooms by putting them on skewer sticks and roasting them over the burners they had in the huts. I tried roasting one, first, over a candle, but that was painfully slow...). It got dark super early, by around 6pm, so we were ready for bed by around 8pm. About an hour after we got to the hut, an English couple arrived as well, and stayed in the bunks with us. They had come with a different company, but they seemed to have received less guidance than we did with regards to gear and paddling.
Sleep came early, and easy, with the cool fall air, and fire crackling a room over.


Day 3 (Thursday April 12): Day 2 of the River Trip- John Coull Hut to Tieke Kainga


We were sent off that morning by the father and daughter wardens of the site- they gave us a fern leaf to put in the front of our canoe. The essential purpose behind that is we were taking a part of that place with us to the next. It was a peace offering, but also tapu (sacred). The Maori people believe that the shadow of the fern leaf on the water's surface would scare away any river demons that might be lurking beneath, waiting to flip our waka (canoe).

This was our longest day- about 37km. Fortunately, it only rained in the morning, so we were significantly less wet than we were the previous night when we arrived at our final destination. This day went by much faster, as we spent a good part of the morning singing songs we both knew (please do not request a re-enactment, as I did not say we sang well). Naturally, this lead us to try and remember any number of Disney, Beatles' or classic rock songs. My favourites were the following:


-Colours of the Wind (from Pocahontas)
-Just Around the River Bend (also Pocahontas, but we only knew the one line, so it was a very short song... it just really fit well with our paddling down a river)
-Imagine (The Beatles)
-Bohemian Rhapsody (Queen)


And, my all-time favourite:

Then, as time and straining physical endurance would have it, we started to tell stories. Sara had a few from Sweden that I hadn't heard before which, truth be told, I can't remember well enough to relate back to you all. And she had heard all of the stories that I grew up to, so I improvised.


This initiated the re-telling of movies that either the other person hadn't seen, or just couldn't remember all that well.


The candidates? (which actually took us from Day 2 of the river trip, to the end of Day 3)


Me: Tall Tales (featuring Patrick Swayze in his younger days!)
Sara: Beauty and the Beast (I hadn't seen this movie in such a long time)
Me: Willow (an old George Lucas film- fantastic movie!)
Sara: Anastasia (I used to love this movie when I was little-r)


I should mention that we were not entirely alone on this trip- the entire time down river, we were often accompanied by ducks and birds of various varieties, but also by wild goats. These goats are not native to New Zealand and are actually quite the pests here- as are possums. There were many traps set up along the way to try to kill these animals, because they were severely endangering the native species in the area. For Sara and I, it was kinda exciting to see the goats, because there are very few large mammals in New Zealand that aren't farmed. None are native, and the large-ish mammals that are here (e.g. deer) are pests. Deer, apparently, are farmed, but I've also heard tell of hunting as well, so maybe some escaped. There are a great number of sheep though- they actually out-number the people. 3 to 1 is the ratio, I believe, of sheep to people. Strange that...


This day was also special because we got to go see the Bridge to Nowhere. This is, as strange as it seems, exactly what it sounds like. It is a large, concrete bridge in the middle of nowhere, leading to... well, nowhere. The story goes that New Zealand WWI veterans were promised farmland when they returned. The land they were given was, shall we say... difficult to work with. It was basically dense, hilly bush, with no perceptible crop plot areas. Suffice it to say that after a few decades of trying to tame the land, the veterans gave up, and they moved their families out of there. But... not before a bridge was built.

This would be on the walk to the Bridge. Fun Fact: we had the Indiana Jones theme song stuck in our heads for the greater part of our entire Easter Break.

We rolled up to our final camping spot at around 4pm. This place was much different from the previous night for several reasons. One: it was located right next to a marae (which is a Maori meeting house). Two: we felt, at first, distinctly less welcome than we did at the previous hut. Three: there were far more people there (all of whom were camping in tents, and didn't seem to like us very much).


The head warden was a Maori woman named Y. At first, I'll be honest, I was kind of scared of her because she was not sending out the warm and fuzzy vibes at all. But that night, we got her talking about the area, about her people's history along the river, and the current issues facing her people today. The conversation went on for quite a while, and by the end of it, I think we were all feeling a lot more comfortable with one another.


There were 2 high school girls working with Y, as a sort of internship for a scholarship/recognition program. They were leaving the following morning as well (to go back home), so all of us camping there were invited to join in a powhiri (welcoming ceremony) and farewell ceremony on their marae. Note: because we were not formally welcomed on to the marae until Day 3 of the river trip, we were not allowed to walk there beforehand (it is a Maori custom, or tikanga).


Day 4 (Friday April 13): Day 3 of the River Trip- Tieke Kainga to Pipiriki


This morning we all participated in an altered powhiri and farewell ceremony. It had to be altered, as there were no men present who were already considered a part of the marae. It was a humbling experience to learn more about this culture and the regional differences around New Zealand. For example, all of the women had to either wear a skirt, or tie a shirt in front of their hips, given the sacred nature of their reproductive organs and capacity to give life. In addition, once we were all inside the marae, each of us had to name (before giving our actual names): our mountain, our river and our people that we identified with. This was because each of those things was here long before us, and we had to show respect to them. It was also so that the mountain, river and people of the Wanganui region would know who we are, and more about our history, with that knowledge. In case you were interested the mountain I chose: the Rocky Moutains (I was having a moment when I couldn't actually remember the name of any one mountain in that range, so I chose them all). The river I chose: the Missinaibi River (this place has quite a few memories for me, and was where I really learned how to river paddle). The people I chose, though I (as far as I know) can claim no biological relation nor history with them, is the Innu people of Northern Labrador. I chose this group of people (after clearing it with Y, to make sure I wasn't showing any disrespect), because I went on a month-long sea kayaking trip in Labrador a few years ago, and had really related to the Innu people who have made their lives there for thousands of years. Here's a map of Canada for you, a visual if you like:

Red triangle= Rocky Moutains; blue line= Missinaibi River; purple circle= Innu people

Here are some pictures of the marae:

After each of us had introduced ourselves, we had a waiata. This is the waiata (song) we all sang:


Te aroha
Te whakapono
Me te rangimarie
Tatou Tatou e.


It is a song about love and peace, simple and nice to listen to.


We gave the marae a koha (which is a gift, of sorts, in thanks for welcoming us). All of us gave a few dollars, and Sara and I also left the fern leaf which we had brought from the previous campsite. Y gave us another to take with us to the end of our journey.


We had a hongi as well, which is a handshake, plus gentle nose press to 'share the breath of life'. It was done twice, so each of the visitors and those already part of the marae could have one (Y and one of the interns took the role of members of the marae).


The last leg of our trip was about 21km long. This was also where the biggest rapids were. We got through them all right, but in one of them, our boat filled up about halfway and we spent a good half hour bailing it out. Fortunately, we were prepared for it, so nothing got lost or soaked (apart from us).

We did it!!

The van was scheduled to pick us up around 2pm, and we rolled into the dock between 1 and 1:30pm. We got unloaded and not too long after a van rolled up and had room for us- and the 6 other people who had finished before us (not the ones we camped with, but other- much nicer- people).


The van took us back to Ohakune, where we dropped our gear off, picked up our packs and got to the bus stop around 3:20pm, in time for our bus which was supposed to come at 3:40pm, but ended up being about 20 minutes late.


This bus took us to New Plymouth. We had a stopover in a town on the way there. We walked to a small mall about 10 minutes away from the station and set up camp on a bench inside. We each then took turns going into the local grocery store, buying food, and eating it on the bench. After 3 days of no showers and paddling, we probably made quite a sight, especially with our massive backpacks. Ah well, we didn't get kicked out, which I was pretty surprised at.


We got to New Plymouth around 11pm, and stayed at a hostel called 'Ariki Backpackers'. They were, hands down, the best hostel we stayed at. It was clean, decently priced, the people were super friendly, and the rooms were nicely furnished. It didn't take long for us to crash.


Saturday April 14th (Also my parents anniversary- Happy Anniversary!)


Sara and I had decided that we would let ourselves sleep in this morning- until around 9AM or so. I got up before her, did the shower thing and wandered out into the hostel lobby. We were planning on going to Mount Taranaki that day (where 'The Last Samurai' was filmed, fyi). Being the super pro-active people that we are, we hadn't really thought about our day's plans any further than that. We just figured, meh, we'll find a shuttle to take us to the mountain- no biggie.  I decided to go talk to the hostel reception, to see if they had any suggestions for shuttles that day. This is the conversation that followed, though probably not word for word- my memory isn't that stellar:


Me: Hi, do you know if there are any shuttles going to Mount Taranaki today? My friend and I were planning to go up there today.
Hotel Reception Man: Oh no! I think you're too late, they tend to leave early in the morning!
Me *sad face*: Oh... do you know of any other way of getting there?
Him: ...Well I could probably give you both a lift up- say for about $15 each. I'll do that sometimes for people living here if they miss the shuttle. And you shouldn't have a problem at all catching a ride back with someone once you're there.
*this was actually a great deal, because the shuttle is $45 per person
*Man walks into reception with massive backpack and hiking poles to check out. 
Reception Man: All set? Where are you heading off to today
Backpacker: I'm hiking up Mount Taranaki today. Driving up there today.
*Reception man and I exchange a rather conniving look- a light bulb moment,as it were.
Me *walk into field of view of backpacker*: Hi! My name's Victoria and my friend and I were actually planning on going up to Taranaki as well- would you have space in your car for 2?
Him: Yeah, of course, meet in 20 minutes?
Me *cue excitement*: Yes!


Now, for those of you who don't know me very well, I will provide you some background information on my personality. When I get really excited about things happening and going to plan... I have an extreme burst of energy, generally can't keep still, and take on the personality traits of the squirrel from 'Over the Hedge'. Basically, I tend to run around with only half-conscious thoughts guiding my haphazard activity.
Example:

Which is why I ended up running back to the room Sara and I were staying in (she had just gotten out of the shower), and was basically jumping up and down as I told her what had transpired. I think by then she had gotten used to my excitable antics, and we managed to get ready in time to go meet our ride.


As it turns out, the other girl we were sharing our hostel room with who was supposed to take the shuttle, ended up catching a ride with this guy as well, because her shuttle never showed up. I gave our driver $20 to cover gas money up there (we split this into thirds later).


And that is how Sara and I managed to hitch a ride to Mount Taranaki for about $40 cheaper than we had expected. This is also the basis for the post title, none of us could come up with a good punch line for the joke though, unfortunately.


It is an understatement to say that Mount Taranaki is beautiful. We did a mid-mountain round trip route. Unfortunately, we got there too late to hike to the summit. Which means I have to go back at some point in my life to go to the top. We had the most perfect weather for it too. And the radio tower we hiked to was at about cloud level, which felt so amazing!
Here are some pictures from the hike:

The hike up was super steep, but the hike down consisted of about a million stairs. We were all pretty happy to make it back to the base lodge. On the way down, we were passed by another backpacker heading down the track. I saw him standing by himself beside his car in the parking lot. I pointed at him and, rather loudly, said "THAT'S OUR RIDE!" We ran over to him and asked him if he would give the three of us a ride back to New Plymouth. At first, he said "no", but because he didn't seem to understand what we were saying, and he had a German accent, we got Ana (our hostel- roomie) to translate. Once he knew what we wanted, he offered to give us a ride back to our hostel- and wouldn't accept any money for it either.
FYI there are A LOT of Germans in New Zealand. If you meet someone, and they have an accent that sounds non-English European-like, they're probably from Germany.


When we got back to New Plymouth, Sara and I grabbed our books and headed out to book the next leg of our trip at the i-Site. The lady working there was super helpful and got us a discounted rate for our tour of Cape Reinga we scheduled for Monday. 


New Plymouth has a really nice harbour on the ocean, so we spent about an hour sight-seeing, reading our books- Game of Thrones!!!- and (in my case) playing in the water and getting my jeans soaked. We discovered this little, kinda out of the way, beach and while I was playing chicken with the waves (I must say they won), a guy rolled up on his bicycle. We got to talking a bit and he mentioned a few bars that were good to go to in town that night. We figured that we'd probably run into him at some point, given how small New Plymouth (and its night life) is.

I won't bore you with minor details of the rest of our evening, but I will give you some highlights:


-Sara and I each got a free glass of wine at the tapas bar where we had dinner, because we offered our corner table to the large group of people who just came into the restaurant.


-We saw a live band at the local Irish pub, where we met up with bicycle man (no, i can't remember his name) and his friend


-We all went to a rather gangster-type club where, when the dance floor was still kinda empty, I got to use some of my breaking moves (this was probably the best part of the night for me, I'll be honest)


In total, we got about 4 hours sleep before we had to catch the bus the next morning to Paihia.


And so finishes Part 1 of our Easter adventure.


More to come later!!!